Monday, August 31, 2015

Perspective: + / - a Lunch Conversation


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     The other day, I had lunch with a friend and colleague. Both of us where in the same age bracket; both professionally accomplished with graduate degrees and history of professional accomplishments.

 

     Both of us were not in a great place, not where we were envisioning for ourselves. We talked about professional direction, financial flow and relationship issues.


     My friend said “We are in the same age bracket, and in a similar situation … we are not where we need to be.”

She then added “How can you be optimistic about professional direction and improved financial flow?” How can you speak positively of being in love? … How can you be happy?”


     What makes the perspective of happy or unhappy.


     Is being happy dependent on data that presents itself?



     It seems to me that data can be misleading.


     I took to heart two songs that talked about happiness. The first song, “Don’t Worry be happy,[i]” didn’t make sense to me at first. As I thought about it, the song made a great deal of sense.  A focus on worry is a focus on negative emotional energy. When I examine myself and decide to worry, I am projecting negative energy both on a thinking energy level, and an emotional or feeling energy level. I have learned that these energies combine to create more negativity, more things to worry about. 


     Focusing on what makes me happy, directs my thinking and feeling energy in a different direction. When I am happy I am more creative, more productive, more fulfilled. As Pharell says “It might seem crazy what I’m about to say … here comes bad news … give me all you’ve got … I should just warn you I’ll be just fine … no offense to you … can nothing bring me down … because I’m happy … .”[ii]


     I would suggest that the difference between my perspective and my friends perspective has to do with two dynamics: first, a belief in spiritual energy, spiritual source energy which is caring and giving; second, it is important to have faith ~ that will allow us to receive the gifts that we are requesting from God (source).  I do believe that Spiritual source energy provides us with that which we desire but there is a hitch  … do our patterns that we have learned and integrated over time prevent us from accepting and working with the gift from Source Energy (God) that flows from our desires? Do the cultural norms wrap us so tightly that we cannot see beyond the negative experience or even believe that more positive experiences can’t come our way? Could unhappiness be due to our own resistance?


     Another possible block to happiness is when we experienced something very painful, a trauma that shook up our faith, and questioned our ability to let the trauma go. Retained trauma no longer exists but is kept alive and even fed by our emotional energy. It might seem counter intuitive but the trauma has to be looked at, accept that it was painful, and make a choice to reclaim our energies from the people who have hurt us. This involves putting a distance between ourselves and the person who created the harm. It also frees our emotions to return to a happier state of being, which allows us to chose positive experiences and be excited about what is unfolding before us.


     We are not an accident or a mistake; we don’t have to justify ourselves. I do believe that our mission is to be happy, to expand our blessings and to inspire others to be all they can be. Data that presents itself as “reality” can fog over our mission but it is easy to clear the fog via the connective medium of meditation.


     Have you ever had circumstances, “reality” data that interfered with your being happy? Feel free to share your questions or comments.






[i] Bobby McFerrin, “Don’t  worry, be happy”
[ii] Pharrell Williams, “Happy”

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